Written by: Zion Tesfaye
I need to be honest with my feelings. The truth is, deep down I find myself sometimes questioning if you will ever give me the desires of my heart. I truly love you…but it’s hard for me to have faith in certain areas. Today I’m discouraged with myself and how different my life looks than what I imagined. I want to surrender these feelings to you and learn to be grateful for what you are doing and all you have done. Even when these thoughts try to control me, I will look to you. I will find strength in you, and trust that you will bring the peace and comfort I need in and out of every season. I pray that I set my heart and focus on who you are, and not what I am hoping for. The truth is even when I feel alone, you are with me and you are preparing me for things my eyes haven’t even seen. Thank you for teaching me today that this life is nothing about who I am, and what I have- but everything about the “the GREAT I am”
Jesus, have your way in me.
March 3rd, 2017 I sat at my kitchen table and pulled out my journal to talk to God about what was heavy on my heart.
I was raised in a home where God was always glorified, and with parents who set the best example on what a godly marriage is. This gave me such high hopes on what to look for in a future husband. I knew exactly what I wanted, and the more I grew in my walk with God, the more I began to look forward to one day meeting the man God prepared for me.
I am now 21 years old and haven’t seen that prayer come to pass, and I have to admit, I thought my life would look a lot differently around now. Even through all serving, ministering, and leading, I would drift off and wonder “did God forget about me?”
What I learned through this journey of singleness is that when we trust God for His best, the enemy will do anything to keep us from receiving it. At this point of my life there were so many good things coming my way yet I found myself focused on with what I did not have.
“But as for me, I will look to the Lord;
I will wait for the God of my salvation;
my God will hear me.” Micah 7:7
Maybe you feel the same way at times, and that’s okay. If you find yourself waiting for something that just seems so far from happening, I believe it’s because that desire serves a purpose that is greater than what you can see right now. God knows the when, the where, and the how, all He asks of us is to lean on Him and hold his hand through it all. When our hopes and dreams seem out of reach, trusting God with every detail will never leave us disappointed.
The beauty is that when we are invested in Christ, nothing is delayed.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
and do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make straight your paths.” Proverbs 3:5-6
I realized that we could be doing all the right “things” as woman of God, but it doesn’t mean God’s timing will all of the sudden be right. There are days when I get frustrated, and impatient, but prayerfully have now been able to turn those emotions into worship.
God is so patient with us, and it makes me wonder why we struggle to be patient with Him?
No matter how challenging those seasons of waiting may be, whether it’s for a spouse, a job, a child- you don’t ever have to be anxious, you don’t ever have to waste a day worrying because when you surrender those desires to God you will see Him do exceedingly and abundantly more than you could ever think or ask. I have learned that there is purpose in the waiting, even if it doesn’t always make sense.
“For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55:9
So, my dear sister next time you want to complain about your season, I challenge you to dance, and praise God for what He has in store. His plans are beautiful, and so is His timing!!
“Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill his promises to her!" Luke 1:45
God loves you and so do I,