Leading Well
Choosing What’s Better: Leading Beyond Distraction
By Bianca Schaefer
INTRODUCTION
At Gather to Lead, we believe that leading well begins with being well. In a world marked by anxiety, comparison, and self-doubt, we want to equip women with weekly principles that anchor leadership in wholeness. Together, we are learning to prioritize wellness—emotional, spiritual, physical, and mental—so that our lives reflect the integration we long to see in our leadership. When we lead ourselves well, we lead others well. And when we return to the core of who we are in Christ, we lead not from scarcity or striving—but from a place of grounded presence.
We offer you this first installment by Bianca Schaefer, who comes with years of experience in the wellness space and a deep desire to encourage you in your own wellness journey.
Choosing What’s Better
Luke 10:40–42 (NIV)
“But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, ‘Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!’
‘Martha, Martha,’ the Lord answered, ‘you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.’”
Maybe you know the story. Martha is trying to be the perfect host. Mary sits at Jesus’ feet. And Martha? She’s overwhelmed, distracted, and probably feeling a bit resentful. Sound familiar?
As women leaders, we understand Martha's impulse. We long to get it right—to lead with impact, steward our call well, and make space for others at the table. But in the pursuit of “doing it all,” we sometimes lose sight of the one thing needed.
Here’s the challenge: We want the focus to be on the message God has placed in our hearts—not on our clothes, body type, or whether we’re sweating under the stage lights. Yet, we can unintentionally become our own worst critics, allowing superficial thoughts to distort the way we lead and live.
Let’s be clear: Leading well isn’t just about what you do. It’s about what you think.
And more specifically—what you believe about yourself.
The thoughts you ignore may be the very ones undermining your leadership.
That’s why Paul urges us in 2 Corinthians 10:5 to “take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”
When self-doubt creeps in, when your mind focuses more on how you’re being perceived than who you’re called to serve, stop and ask:
A Leadership Reminder
Yes, we’ve all had “those moments”—lettuce in our teeth, smudged mascara, wardrobe mishaps. But leadership isn’t about appearing perfect. It’s about choosing the better thing. Choosing presence over performance. Substance over self-consciousness.
So, the next time you're on a platform, at a pulpit, or simply present with your people—
remember this: You don’t need to be perfect. You just need to be focused.